the forgotten signature.

well. aderito's passport request came. there was much rejoicing. then, he fedexed everything here to me... the letter, passport, pictures. i went through everything and made sure that the paperwork was filled out, the pictures were in thier separate envelopes. then, off to buffalo my mom and i went. it's cheaper to just drive over the border and send it off from fedex over there. i was so excited to have it sent off to new york!! i was so excited to go home and call aderito so we could celebrate! i was in mid-celebration... when i realized that aderito had forgotten to sign the passport request paperwork. ugh. i called fedex quickly... but, it had already been sent off. so, now we wait. will new york send everything back... and aderito will fill out and SIGN the request this time? will new york be ok with the paperwork not being signed and give aderito his visa? who knows. i keep checking his email to see if they send another request... so we can get it right this time. i think that it's totally valid for me to feel like i've been in immigration limbo for the past 6 months. it's not fun. i hope that i'm able to get out of it soon... and onto a higher, more stable ground.

how is work... you ask? well. umm. perhaps we should talk about something else. if it does happen to come up in conversation... all that will be said is that it is a means to an end. that's it.

the eating has went wonderfully! my lunches have been plentiful and healthy. i drink 2 liters of water during the day. and umm... dinners at night have went well too. tonight was salmon and potatoes. i felt good about the lack of vegetables... i ate many veggies today already for lunch and snacks.

ok. back to the work conversation. i was totally wrong about the hours i would be working. i made it clear that i will only work during the day. so, my shifts are... 9-5 monday to friday. i can handle that. as well as every other saturday 10-6. i can handle that too. however, the week i work saturday... i don't get another day off during the week... nope, that week i have to work 6 days. ick. that means this weekend i have to work saturday. but, easter weekend... i get 3 days off. giddy up!! i love that! i plan on baking that weekend. we have a shitload of bananas that need to be transformed into bread. yum.

i miss aderito extra right now. i think that it's because last year i saw him in september and then only had to wait until december. that's 3 big bad months. nothing at all!! this time... i left him in january and i won't see him again until july. eff. that's a long time. it's not the longest we've ever went... but, seriously.... it's toooo long. initally we said that he would only vacation for 2 weeks this year. but, i'm not sure if that's possible. seriously... away for 6 months and together for 2 weeks?! and then during that time he thinks that i should keep working. blahhhhhh. no way. no chance. i think i need some chocolate.

and that's exactly what i am going to do... i am going to eat chocolate. cadbury flake. and then... call aderito. i also may or may not be watching dancing with the stars.

the day before: work

yet again... i'm sitting in bed watching tv. desperate housewives. it's not super interesting, kinda keeping my attention. however, my mind keeps wandering to tomorrow morning.

you see... tomorrow is the day that i start my new job. ha! i should just say... i start a job. it's been a while since i've worked. i was laid-off december 2008. aderito was working a lot... and we were able to save money, even with me not working. and well... 2009 was the year of travelling. cuba, portugal and then bermuda. in between all that was the crazy gathering, sorting, filling out of paperwork, and hoping. lots of hoping. that pretty much filled up last year. so, now... i need to work. my mind needs keep busy, my body needs to do something, and we need to really save moola for the big move next year!

i'm a bit nervous about starting this new job. it's not a difficult job. it's just the unexpected. i love to know what's going to happen. i do not like surprises. at all. i do love expectations... lay them out for me... and i will do anything to meet them and exceed them. why i wasn't like this in high school, i don't know. i get to wear clothes to work. not that i worked naked before. it was always chef uniforms i was wearing, and of course the restaurants i have worked in didn't allow any sort of personal style. so, this will be a nice change... kinda. i have to wear "business casual" clothes. i went and shopped on thursday, found a really nice pair of pants... and black flats. hopefully i will be conservative enough. i'm excited to check everyone else out, see how far i can get away from the business part and closer to the oh-so-wonderful casual.

this is going to sound... not nice. but, every time i start a new job... i worry that people are going to want to be my friend. i'm nice, outgoing, super friendly, and funny. which bodes well in a work place... but then people want to hang out with me. i just want to work, go home, talk to aderito... and plan our plans. i have friends. i have people that i like already. goodness. thinking this is my head is a whole lot different than typing it out, and reading how wretched i sound. i do want work friends, i just don't want them to be my out-of-work friends. is that bad? it's bad.

a new job means change. so, tomorrow will also be the beginning of eating healthy. i made a big huge quinoa salad filled with veggies to take for lunch all week. i bought yogurt, and fruit, and raw almonds to snack on... i will NOT get caught up in the office junk food. oh! i also have a water bottle that i picked up today, i hope to drink more water too. as for quick healthy dinners through out the week... i think that i'll figure something out. thankfully my shift is over at 4pm, it will take about an hour to get home. i have a feeling that this will be a good trial week, but that i just might have to make a dinner plan. i like plans. systems. schedules. when they are on my terms... and planning dinner. definitely up to me! however, i won't complain if my mom cooks... she made some killer barbeque chicken last night!

somewhere in there i need to find time to walk... or move in general. when i get home from work? i think that's the best time. there is no chance that i am going to be getting up at 6am to work out... getting up at 7am will be hard enough!

time to close down the computer. get comfy in bed. watch a bit more nonsense on tv... and hopefully my eyes will close easily, and my mind will stop making that whirring noise.

closer to being together...

monday are brutal for television. ick. i am ashamed to admit that i am indeed watching "molly and jason's wedding - the bachelor". my excuse is that i need closure... i watched jason's season of the bachelor from the beginning, i see to see it though and watch the wedding. ha!

oh yes. immigration. well. i called ottawa, and asked what was going on with aderito's medical results. the woman on the other end was NOT happy that i had her phone number... i apologized and told her that i was told she was able to tell me what was going on... when she finally conceded, i didn't have the proper file number in order for her to find the medicals!! ugh. so, that ended up not going well. thankfully, i am a bit of an immigration forum addict. there was a case that started a bit before mine, and was processed in record time. this person was super pro-active and sent a fax to ottawa, and requested that the medicals be sent onto the consulate. i sent this person a message, and she was so sweet and kind!! together with two different fax numbers, she also sent a copy of the fax that she had sent to ottaw!! perfect. so, i faxed ottawa... and heard a response from them the next day!! woohoo!! march 2nd, i checked aderito's email... lo and behold there was an email from new york!!! yes! it said that his passport request was in the mail!! yay! how wonderful! we are waiting for aderito to receive that letter still, from north america it takes about 2 weeks for a letter to get to aderito. it's mostly bermuda's fault... they are pretty slow when it comes to mail processing. ugh. so, by next monday aderito should have that lovely letter in his hand!! from there he has to do a bit more paperwork, a few more pictures, and then it all gets sent to new york!! weeee!! new york then puts a visa into his passport, and sends a letter of confirmation of permanent residence. and then... when aderito is here he lands, we start paperwork for his sin card, health card, everything!!

of course, aderito won't be staying when he comes in july. he will be going back to bermuda... his contract isn't over until october... and even then he can stay for another 3 months after his contract is finished. i think that i will go to bermuda again this year for christmas... only this time aderito will come back with me!! where we will go from there... i have no idea.

i've been doing so much research trying to figure out where aderito can work. there are a few construction companies in toronto that request the employee be able to speak portuguese on the job site. hopefully one of those jobs will work out for aderito... and depending on which job he gets... we will decide where to live. it's going to be north of toronto, as much fun as it would be being downtown right in portugal village... it's far too expensive. yikes!!

ohh!! i've found a job. it's bizarre... because it's far from what i've done over the past 10 years in the kitchen. it will be so nice to work, i'm ready anything. to wake up at a normal time. and well... to make some money. it would be nice for aderito and i to have some money saved up for when he moves here.

guess what time of the year it is? time for nikki to start moving her ass a bit. i'm really ready to start riding my bike again. i would like to start running. two years ago, i started running a bit. i think this will be the year that i start running full time. i have shoes. all i need is an ipod, and i'll be good to go. oh. and i would prefer for the snow to melt first too. then, i will run. i don't really have any other excuses. i live in a pretty good area, with a trail that's really close. i just need some.. motivation. ha! oh boy... do i even need motivation.

tomorrow i'm having lunch with 2 of my favourite people. i'm excited. hopefully i'm able to get some sleep tonight!!

pretty much the same...

since i changed my blog link... i have no idea if anyone is reading anymore. i decided that this blog most definitely had less and less to do with me and cooking. and more and more to do with the familia pacheco. ah. it's nice to say that. my little family with aderito and i. i love it. we are looking forward to being together soon. we know that it won't happen too soon though. next christmas is the goal. i really hope that happens.

not a whole lot has changed with our immigration application. well a little bit. while i was in bermuda the entire package was returned. with a letter that told me that i had forgotten to include aderito's work visa. proof that aderito indeed is living and working in bermuda. so, i sent that bad boy back. the beginning of february i checked out ecas... it not only said that they had begun processing the pr application, but that it had been sent from buffalo to new york. aderito hasn't received any letters from new york telling us why. so, it could be because they want to expedite the process and buffalo was backed up so they sent it off. or, it could be because they want to do an interview. however, i requested that our interview be done in detroit if it couldn't be done in buffalo. tomorrow morning i am going to call ottawa and ask about aderito's medical stuff. he had it done in bermuda and from there they are supposed to send it to ottawa. when the center that is processing the permanent resident application is ready they request the medicals. sometimes they don't go... or take a while. so, i'm going to call... and see where they are. hopefully they are indeed in ottawa... and they just need a gentle push in the right direction. that would be ideal. what we don't want is for them to be lost. that would be the worst possible situation. we paid over $1000 for them to get done. we most definitely can not afford to do them over again!! goodness.

i still need a job. so so badly i need one. but, i need one during the day. that's it. aderito works all day... and our time is at night. it's created this sense of living together... and most definitely consistency. we both like knowing that the other person is at home hanging out... doing normal people things... together, at the same time... just not in the same country. so, that means that i need to work during the day. i will do anything. work anywhere. i've sent my resume to so many places. perhaps tomorrow... all of them will call. that would be wonderful... cause i want to work... and i like options.

the olympics have been a nice distraction from the worry and stress. however, i find that they just create a new worry and stress. i know that canadian athletes are good... i believe that we can win a lot of medals. it's just... sometimes i don't think that they believe it enough. perhaps that's unfair. it's just how i feel about it at the moment.

my lung is gurgley... the right one. lowish. it's been like this for 3 days now. more at night... it's weird. i'm going to google... and do some self diagnosing. eek!

swaggin' and sighin'

yeah, it's late... and i should try and sleep soon. i'm just not ready yet. usually, i'm watching a random series on surfthechannel. but, there just isn't anything that i want to watch right now. ok, not true. i would really like to watch either "community" or "head case". however, they aren't available in full series... just a few random episodes. so, instead i'm kinda watching jimmy fallon. and doing random internet searches. there is a good reason for that though...

see over there... you might have to scroll down. but, over to the side i have a link for "swag bucks", there is also something over there called a "swidget".

about a month ago, i was reading emily's blog who writes under1000permonth. she's broadened my view on saving money, interesting ways to be frugal, and making money doing something that we all do each day. ah yes. swagbucks.

pretty much all you have to do is sign up, and then use their search engine to... search. randomly you are awarded with "swag bucks" and after a while... they accumulate. once you have 45, you cash them in for $5 amazon.ca gift cards. or save your bucks for bigger gift cards, or for clothing... or whatever! i wasn't sure about this whole thing... but, i find myself searching for recipes, blogs, or when i'm helping siobhan with her homework all the time anyways so i figured it was worth a try. i signed up the 25th of october and i already have 44 bucks! you also get swagbucks from finding codes... and paying attention to the swagbuck facebook page.

i didn't know the best way to tell people about it. but, i figured this was a pretty good way. so, go on... sign up. and if you have any questions, just ask me! :)



other news. all the immigration paperwork was sent!! wooohooo!! it was received at the case processing center mississauga (CPC-M) on october 30th. which was way before my original deadline. i've been on a canadian immigration forum like crazy these past few days. everyone posts questions.. and always includes their time lines. from what i see... the average processing time for sponsorship is 21 days. even though the cic website says that it is 35. so, hopefully aderito and i will know whether or not i have been approved to sponsor him by november 20th. if i am approved... our case will then be sent to buffalo. where they will do extensive background checks, go over his medical check, and read through everything that we sent proving that our relationship is real, genuine and continuing. oh!! in the immigration forum, i asked whether as a sponsor i need a job or not. the response was that because i am sponsoring my husband, i am exempt from the financial aspect. i pray constantly that this is true. there is a system that is set up online that allows me to check and see where in the process they are with my paperwork... it's called ecas... i don't remember what it means. anyways... i am tempted to sign in all day long to see if they have even opened my case yet!! however... i will be patient. i will.

sigh.

the sugar bear.

i don't remember how it started. there must have just been a box of it in the back pantry. but, at the moment i can't get enough of kashi golean crunch cereal. it's offically the best i've ever had. there is a very specific reason why i feel so much love towards this cereal. it doesn't get mushy. unlike aderito, who soaks cookies in milk and eats it. i need my cereal crunchy from my first bite to the very last. kashi golean cereal stays crunchy. and it tastes like... sugar crisp. remember that cereal? apparently, it's only called sugar crisp in canada and in the states called golden crisp. after just doing a bit of reading about sugar crisp, it is said that 50% of it's weight is sugar. goodness. no wonder i liked that so much as a kid! kashi still has 13g of sugar per cup. but, i'm ok with that at the moment. after eating a cup of it i'm usually not hungry for hours. which is my kind of tasty crunchy cereal.

jobbing. it's like jogging, except you only use your fingers. seriously, i need a job so very bad. there are places that i've sent my CV to that i never thought i would. suzy shier?! yes. pumpkin patch?! yes. chicken factory?! yes. everywhere. i sent it out about 6 more times yesterday, and will again on monday when all the new jobs are posted again. there has been prayer without ceasing for a job... which i need... immediately.

there is loads of paperwork that needs to be filled out for immigration. it's almost there. monday i will finish the rest. put it altogether. look it over 3 more times. make sure it all has been photocopied 2 times. the thing is though. is that i need a job. they need to know that i am able to support both of us. even though, aderito could potentially work in bermuda for another 2 years. he makes amazing money there. i don't think that it is going to be difficult for us to find a job anywhere though. we are willing to go wherever a potential job needs us to go. preferably not anywhere northern... so, almost anywhere. in the meantime however, or i guess... as soon as possible, i need to work. agora.

fall isn't my favourite month. i appreciate the leaves, how beautiful it all looks. i even have this strange affinity towards it... in my head i think that if i was to match any season it would be fall. it makes my red hair seem to flame, and my fair skin glow. yet. i don't really like fall at all. i have a theory however as to why i might feel this way. "the fall of freddie the leaf: a story of life for all ages". after my dad died, someone... probably a grief counsellor gave my mom this book. it made sense, i was 12, erin was 9, and jim was 8. a book was a very good way to explain death when adult words don't make sense. but, this book is about freddie and his leaf friends. they are born in the spring, grow big and strong in the summer, but when the fall comes they all die. that's it, the life cycle. leaving me, for the rest of my life to resent fall a little bit. fall, my kindred in colour. every year when autumn comes... i find myself watching all the little freddies drift onto the ground, i sit looking out the window watching freddies blow across the yard. i'm already looking forward to spring.

kelly is going to be here soon. we are going to bake pumpkin scones. i made them about a month ago, and it's time to bake some more... i've missed them. my mom and i bought ourselves scones from starbucks last week. they were wretched. the scones we once looked forward to driving and buying, we no longer think about. only the delicious homemade ones. mmm. i'm also excited to hang out with kel. she's a pretty cool chick!

not me monday...

during my obsessive blog reading over the past month... i've decided that my absolute favourite new one is mckmama. seriously, how could a blog about a family with 4 small children all under the age of 4 not be incredibly entertaining? and, as i could only imagine being a mother of so many small children you would occasionally have to do things you would have never imagined as a childless adult. in mckmama's words this is why "not me monday" had a purpose... "born out of my desire to admit some of my imperfections and reveal a few moments i'd rather forget. you may find it therapeutic to join in and do the same thing!"

this is the first monday since i've been been following her blog since i read it from the very beginning. so, i thought that perhaps i should participate. you know, clear the air... and get out any possible antics that i most definitely... did not do!

my mom, siobhan and i went on an excursion to the grocery store. we needed just random bits of stuff for thanksgiving dinner. you know... parchment paper, baking soda, icing sugar, bread for stuffing. while my mom was off looking at the bread. siobhan i did most certainly did not sneak in a huge tray of cream cheese iced cinnamon buns into the cart... and say nothing at all until my mom noticed!! why would we want something so delicious and tasty as that... when we are going to have thanksgiving dinner the next day?!

my mom invited a few extra people on thanksgiving. they brought along with them loads of food. a pumpkin pie, marinated cheese, and a broccoli casserole. later on in the evening when asked how much i enjoyed the broccoli casserole i most certainly did not lie... and say that the broccoli casserole was absolutely delicious. who in the world would lie about broccoli? in casserole form?! not me!

after enjoying thanksgiving dinner... i was in the kitchen cleaning up the many bowls, plates, glasses and pieces of silverware... on the way over to the dishwasher i most definitely did not allow my sister's bulldog ruby lick the potatoes, turkey, and gravy off the spoons!! noooo way! i would be in so much trouble if i ever did something like that!!

mckmama is right! it does indeed feel good to get all that stuff out in the open!